Help!! Excerpt needed

Hey guys -

I am in the process of creating a promotional flyer for Traitor's Knot, and another, for Wars of Light and Shadow series.

Here's the deal: if I were to choose about ONE PAGE of story excerpt, (two excerpts, one to represent the whole series, and another to represent Traitor's Knot) what would you choose that might capture new readers or re-interest an old reader who might be mulling, yea or nay?

These excerpts will go on the back of the flyers, the front of which will have summary info and art…whaddya think?

I can NOT see the forest for the trees, on this one!

originally posted by Sandtiger

I think a flyer is a great idea…they are inexpensive, draw attention and are easily distributed.

And between your brilliant artwork and snippets, a flyer would really attract notice.

Sandtiger ::Thinking this might be a good time to go reread her favourite parts::

originally posted by Hannah

Hmm… it's tough to pick an excerpt that would squeeze into one page.

For the whole series, I would suggest maybe something from the end of GC, when Arithon is kicking butt and taking names whilst rescuing Fionn Areth from Jaelot. Just some short bit of fast action and smooth words–I love that part of the series! There's a lot of scenes I would suggest, but that don't contain a main character.

For TK itself… that's more difficult. I would say part of the **SPOILERS OF COURSE** bit where Arithon meets up with Erlien's clan scouts prior to the crystal/crimson silk raid. That part was great, and I think can be read on its own merits. (A lot of the excerpts from TK would be plot spoilers for the rest of the book, now that I think on it, which should probably try to be avoided I guess…)

Let us know what you decide Janny!


originally posted by Konran

I shall have to go back through my books (again)… but for now, I would suggest either doing contrasting excerpts (one of Arithon and one of Lysaer) or one from the very first book, before they are cursed (the shadows of Mearth? fighting the Mistwraith?) and then something showing the curse in action. More specific suggestions when I manage to glance through the books.

originally posted by Nora

I would pick one of the Lysaer bits, because Arithon always gets the primo position on the cover. It'd be nice to showcase the other perspective, and for long-time readers–I can say that the Lysaer bits in TK made me go back and re-read his earlier sections with more interest and understanding. But alas, maybe too spoily.

originally posted by Andy

TK: Sulfin Evend's meeting with Enithen Tuer in Erdane.

Series: how about Arithon's visit to Halliron's widow. For that matter, any of Arithon's masterbard moments (Jaelot, Merior, Tysan, Mathorns etc.)

originally posted by Auna

I second the Sulfin Evend meeting with Enithen Tuer scene. That gave me chills reading it and definitely made me want to read more. You could also go with the ending where Arithon is being sacrificed, though that might be too revealing.

Overall series… that will be a lot tougher. I really love the scenes with Elaira interacting with any of the F7, and of course the healing of the young fisherman with Arithon. I think Traithe meeting her on the beach is a great snippet. I'll have to think more about this one.

Thanks, and truly, for all your well thought suggestions - I am still stewing this through - I'll let you know. Still not decided, but have some better direction.

originally posted by Beth Caudill

I haven't found a copy of TK yet to read. As of two weeks ago (last time I was in the bookstores) BN & Borders didn't have the books yet. So I can't give an opinion on that.

For the Main Series I have a couple of suggestions:

I would suggest where Asandir opens Arithon's awareness to the Paravians, when Arithon makes the shadow ships and then the curse strikes the princes, the healing of the fisherman at Merior, when Arithon and Dakar try to save the shepard girl, Halliron's and Arithon's songs at Jaelot, and finally maybe something from Kewar (too many good reminiscences in this part to pick just one).


originally posted by Sandtiger

My thoughts, for the main snippet it would best come from either Curse, or perhaps Ships…something early on that resonates to the entire series - that gives a prelude to what comes later. It needs to be bigger, more illustrative, to give those reading it for the first time the sense that the series is wide ranging and impactful.

Going through the first two books, I found a few scenes that I thought stood out - for differing reasons. Some might be a bit spoilery, but in my mind nothing too badly when you consider the wide ranging impact. Something without the slightest spoiler wouldn't necessarily have enough resonance to represent the entire series to date.

Here were my thoughts - with rationale - in order of appearance: (All page numbers from the American Hardcover Editions)

1. Page 179-180 COTM, from, "Dakar already told me" to "What will become of my clansman…"
Rationale: A hint at the conflict to come, that really is one of the driving forces behind the series…offers a hint of knowledge of the two brothers, the Fellowship, the Mistwraith, the clans, and at the scope of disaster that could come. Dangling bits are always good in snippets, so the sharp lack of resolution in the last line might be good. The only problem with this one is that Arithon and Lysaer aren't directly involved in the scene - just alluded to.

2. Page 237 COTM, from "Dakar lost the thread of concentration" to "The Choice is a foregone conclusion"
Rationale: The Black Rose Prophecy - it lines the books - it's the bigger picture. Hints at Davien, the struggle happening above the brothers, Arithon's trials - the biggest problem with this snip though is that there is no mention of Lysaer.

3. Page 411-412 COTM, from "You shall have what you ask for" to "And finding him should be simple."
Rationale: This is one of my favourite options - it's a great Lysaer scene - and it really shows the first steps being played out, and gives hints of a number of other major storylines…Arithon's bardly talents, the fact they are half-brothers, Desh-thiere's curse, that Arithon was destined for Rathain, that Lysaer thinks he's doing the right thing - righting injustice…it has the presence of the fellowship, of Dakar. It's pretty much brilliant - not to mention both the first and last lines are just plain fantastic.

4. SOM - Page 876-877, From: "Lysaer settled into his dark velvet camp chair" to "Lysaer, Prince of the Light"
Rationale: This one isn't quite as action oriented, but it does show a turning point and still harkens to the some of the overarching themes - it shows the moment Lysaer really goes beyond normal fighting to creating himself into an image…shows the animosity with Arithon, the fact that he wants the land to rise against him. There's hints of Davien, the brother's opposing powers, the s'Brydions, Lysaer's own legacy and a hint that it's been twisted.

In terms of Traitor's Knot - the scenes that stuck out in my mind were:




1. Page 68-69, TK, from, "Your Weapon?" to "Would you try?"
Rationale: This is just a great bit of verbal sparring, not to mention it makes you want to know more - it doesn't really give away too much, since we already knew Arithon was holed up with Davien. There's definitely a hint of ominous foreboding, of choices, of possibilities - of interesting bits to ponder, which makes for a desire to read more NOW. (And goodness, what's better than a scene with Davien and Arithon? Couldn't pick a better two people to snippet.)

2. Page 69-70, TK, from "Would you try?" to How will you choose, Teir's S'Ffalenn?"
Rationale: Okay, so I like the entire large scene, but I think either the first half or this second half would make for a good snippet. To a degree, this one has more weight than the first half - it's not only weighted toward the impact of this book, but also refines some of the impact of the series…or at least, it did in my mind. Granted - this second half could be a bit much in the spoiler sense of things.

3. Page 132-133, TK, from, "You have two choices" to "What is a life in the hands of your Fellowship?"
Rationale: For those who have read the previous books, it doesn't give away too much, though Sulfin Evend and Asandir talking does set the curiousity going. This scene offers a fair bit of overall picture while offering a dose of what the books about - It shows how things are in a precarious position, a hint of the dark peril, that things aren't quite as they seem.

There isn't much in Traitor's Knot that isn't rife with spoilers…so picking snippets for this one was harder. After all, if the two flyers were on a table together, how many people would pick up both flyers and read both snippets at the same time?


Wow - that sure was a complete take…I'll dive into the pages to pinpoint those scenes and see. The intense care and work is well appreciated, on all your parts!

Beth - I suggest you order the book direct, or get your local B&N to get it in for you. The distribution is better than it was, but it's still getting "up to speed" - a bit of a push may be necessary to get that title to your local shop. In any event, your patience and persistence is appreciated!

originally posted by michael hammer

perhaps for the overall series the scene where the fisherman pushes Asandir into explaining the balance of every. of why they shouldn't interferr.

I've typed in some of the excerpts mentioned, am mulling them. I've also added the one beginning on page 372 US hardbound, Grand Conspiracy, starting either with "who is he, this boy?" or starting at "You can't do this," Dakar insisted. and ending with "There aren't many factions who wouldn't choose mayhem, or consort with Sithaer itself to see you dead."

The moment is the one where Dakar tries to argue Arithon out of rescuing Fionn Areth - if you look at this scene (its the ending of the subchapter Fulcrum, a subchapter of X. Chain of Destiny if you're trying to locate it in another edition) - it does show how a snippet glimpse of the curse's effects on Both brothers.

I'd favor putting this snip with another of Lysaer - maybe one of the former mentions…it's a little long in combination, though.

Morriel's "reading" of Elaira's take on the two brother's characters, in Mistwraith, encapsulates nicely but it's all exposition, not a lotta life or action.

Still rattling - anybody have suggestions based on the above??

originally posted by Hunter

From Traitor's Knot the scene I would pick would be when Arithon is trying out his mage skills and Davien materializes behind him as Lysaer - Arithon's reaction is priceless as is Davien's comments. Lysaer kind of makes an appearance.

For the whole of the series? Hmm… that's a tough one. Perhaps Dakar's reel of prescience in FP when he sees Arithon about to be gored by the unicorn, the blood running at the sunwheel place (presumably Avenor) and Arithon playing his lyranthe…

The other scene is also from FP - when Lysaer is summoned to Althain. His views of the Paravian statues on the way in, his case of demanding Arithon in chains and his rebuke by the Ath's Adepts, then his views of the statues as mere stone on his way out. Probably needs to be condensed but it's at least a scene that doesn't have Arithon as the key player! And it kind of sums up Lysaer's current views of the series…

<Ooops, sorry, edited this by mistake>

(Message edited by admin on August 29, 2005)

originally posted by hosanna

When I re-read Ships of Merrior I was blown away by the part where Asandir speaks to the s'Brydion brothers about the history of the Fellowship, the Paravians and mankind coming as refugees etc and why not to develop technologically. I think it represents the whole series extremely well - possibly even parts of the series yet to come I hope !!!

originally posted by Mark Timmony

This is a difficult ask Janny!

To be honest I can't think of a scene that I could recommend… I have so manyfavs, and they are all powerful but only when taken in context of the greater whole.

When is your deadline for this task?

I'm trying to have the handouts ready for Dragon con, so, quick!!! But - the quotation can always be changed, so no reason these flyers can't be improved upon.

All these suggestions are good ones !

originally posted by Mark Timmony

Hmmmm, okay.

This is going to be abit of a cop-out for me but i really can't think of a single scene for you Janny.

What I would suggest (from a booksellers POV) is that the scene from larger work needs to 'flashy' with instant/Hollywood-like special fx in it.

For one I would recommend you focus on Lysaer and his crusade against the spinner of darkness.

The other scene focus on Arithon and show/demonstrate that his nature isn't what Lysaer believes.

Hope this helps, and my apologies that I can't be more specific.

originally posted by hosanna

I just remembered another scene that had a huge impact when rereading Warhost of Vastmark as I had not remembered it specifically from the first read.
it is near the end when Asandir comes to Lysaer's war camp. It could represent the series as a whole b/c Lysaer is defying the fellowship, it shows some of the allegations against Arithon, mentions the Curse and the necessity of permission for magic and also I was impressed by the camp follower respecting Asandir.
I have a voyager paperback. maybe from p 501 start the sentence with Asandir instead of He where it goes "He patted the boy's shoulder before he mounted" then you could finish up on p 502 "Lysaer damped back a sullen flare of resentment". that is just slightly over one complete page of text that I think would do the job really well! Probably too late for your purpose but I am excited to find a one page that wouldn't be made up of snippets.